Assalamualakum. Well lately i have been thinking about my friends that i spend time with here and there. and i just read this ayat in surat Hud verse 113. And this ayat got me scared because it seemed like i can be in this situation. I dont participate in the same activities as my friends anymore(oh by the way these friends are mashrikuun) and i say at home a lot but its just that they respect me and my religion and they dont bring any type of fitnah to my apartment. So its pretty cool in that since but at the same time i have been really contemplating on how to deal with the disbelievers in my life. Because these are people who disblieve an i respect as a creation of Allah but at the same time they are close to me because alhumdulilah they have assisted me in several needs. So basically my question is, well i have a few questions. My questions are how do i deal and interact with the mishrikuun and kafiruun in my life? and how should a proper muslim consider kafiruun and mushrikuun and how a proper muslim should not consider the musrikuun and kafiruun? i hope that was clear inshallah. and inshallah you will be able to give knowledge that would benefit inshallah. assalamualakum

All praise be to Allah, and may his peace and blessings be on the last and best prophet and messenger, Muhammad.

 

Your intimate friends and confidants should be Muslim, since they will help you stay close to God and remind you when you are deviating away from his path, the straight path of Islam. It is not conceivable that non Muslims may perform this role.

Allah said:

"الْأَخِلَّاء يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا الْمُتَّقِينَ." 

"Friends on that day will be foes, one to another,- except the Righteous."

Az-Zukhruf, Chapter #43, Verse #67

And he said:

"يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ لاَ تَتَّخِذُواْ بِطَانَةً مِّن دُونِكُمْ لاَ يَأْلُونَكُمْ خَبَالاً وَدُّواْ مَا عَنِتُّمْ قَدْ بَدَتِ الْبَغْضَاء مِنْ أَفْوَاهِهِمْ وَمَا تُخْفِي صُدُورُهُمْ أَكْبَرُ قَدْ بَيَّنَّا لَكُمُ الآيَاتِ إِن كُنتُمْ تَعْقِلُونَ." 

"O ye who believe! Take not into your intimacy those outside your ranks: They will not fail to corrupt you. They only desire your ruin: Rank hatred has already appeared from their mouths: What their hearts conceal is far worse. We have made plain to you the Signs, if ye have wisdom."

Aal-e-Imran, Chapter #3, Verse #118

 

That, however, doesn`t mean that you can`t have friends (in the general sense of the word) who are not Muslim.

What is meant in the Quran by waley or khaleel or bitanah – who need to be Muslims - is different from simply a friend. They mean your closest, most intimate and trusted companions.

As I indicated, this sort of companion needs to be one who will help you stay on the straight path of Islam, which requires them to be Muslim. Moreover, you are not to pick any Muslim for this type of friendship, but one who is righteous and pious.

"الْأَخِلَّاء يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا الْمُتَّقِينَ." 

"Friends on that day will be foes, one to another,- except the Righteous."

Az-Zukhruf, Chapter #43, Verse #67

For the rest of the people, you will maintain a friendly relationship with those who are fair to you, and don`t persecute you on account of your religion. Allah said:

"لَا يَنْهَاكُمُ اللَّهُ عَنِ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يُقَاتِلُوكُمْ فِي الدِّينِ وَلَمْ يُخْرِجُوكُم مِّن دِيَارِكُمْ أَن تَبَرُّوهُمْ وَتُقْسِطُوا إِلَيْهِمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُقْسِطِينَ." 

"Allah forbids you not, with regard to those who fight you not for (your) Faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them: for Allah loveth those who are just."

Al-Mumtahina, Chapter #60, Verse #8

So, for those you can - and you are encouraged to - exchange gifts and visits with them and look after their homes, properties or kids when they are away. You may help them in their times of need, visit them when they are sick, and condole them when they have lost loved ones. You will be rewarded if you intend by this to show them the beauty and generosity of Islam and Muslims.

As for those who insult Islam or the Prophet, you should have nothing to do with them aside from giving them da`wah (educating the ignorant amongst them and refuting the defiant)

Allah said:

"لَا تَجِدُ قَوْماً يُؤْمِنُونَ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الْآخِرِ يُوَادُّونَ مَنْ حَادَّ اللَّهَ وَرَسُولَهُ وَلَوْ كَانُوا آبَاءهُمْ أَوْ أَبْنَاءهُمْ أَوْ إِخْوَانَهُمْ أَوْ عَشِيرَتَهُمْ أُوْلَئِكَ كَتَبَ فِي قُلُوبِهِمُ الْإِيمَانَ وَأَيَّدَهُم بِرُوحٍ مِّنْهُ وَيُدْخِلُهُمْ جَنَّاتٍ تَجْرِي مِن تَحْتِهَا الْأَنْهَارُ خَالِدِينَ فِيهَا رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُمْ وَرَضُوا عَنْهُ أُوْلَئِكَ حِزْبُ اللَّهِ أَلَا إِنَّ حِزْبَ اللَّهِ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ." 

Thou wilt not find any people who believe in Allah and the Last Day, loving those who resist Allah and His Messenger, even though they were their fathers or their sons, or their brothers, or their kindred. For such He has written Faith in their hearts, and strengthened them with a spirit from Himself. And He will admit them to Gardens beneath which Rivers flow, to dwell therein (for ever). Allah will be well pleased with them, and they with Him. They are the Party of Allah. Truly it is the Party of Allah that will achieve Felicity."

Al-Mujadila, Chapter #58, Verse #22.

 

Allah knows best.