Respected shaykh, 

Is it lawful for a father to give the money of the eldest son to his youngest son from his other wife, so that this young man may trade with this money, though he is irresponsible? In general, he has no religious motives and no manners, and his mother is the one who incites him. The father is in his nineties, and his wife is racing time, as she thinks he may pass away at any minute, and she knows how kind and obedient his eldest children are to him, and that they never refuse anything he asks of them. So she is taking advantage of this in order to take as much money as possible from his older children. 

Please note, respected shaykh, that these older brothers were never stingy about spending on their younger brothers ever since they were small children, because these young children were raised in their [older brothers’] house as their mother was eager for that to happen. So by the time the child could walk, and before he knew how to depend on himself, she would send him with his father when the father would visit his older sons, and that is how they were raised. In spite of the many colleges in their area, she insisted that they all study at the colleges where the older brothers had studied. So all the young children graduated from these colleges under the supervision of their older brothers, who covered their expenses. They did not stop there, as the older siblings also paid all their younger brothers’ marriage expenses and did not leave them to make their way in life and struggle to build their futures on their own, as all youth do and as these older brothers had done. These older brothers did not cost their father anything, because by the time one of them enrolled in a university, he relied on himself, as they had high grades and therefore the university granted them scholarships. So they took care of themselves to lessen the burden on their father: the older took care of the younger, and so forth, and that is what they did with their half brothers. 

However, all of that does not satisfy their mother, so she takes advantage of their father’s weakness and her certainty that his older brothers will obey him. She keeps asking for more as she is never satisfied, to the extent that she tried many times to sell the property of the eldest brother who made it on his own, in order to give the proceeds to her son. Now she’s pressuring the father to take 50.000 Egyptian pounds from him to give it to the youngest of her children, who is not married yet, so that he can trade with it. Please note, our shaykh, that he is irresponsible in the true sense of the word, and he was charged with public indecency. But the father, in his weakness of old age and helplessness, can do nothing with her, and what she asks, he does it for her without thinking. 

The eldest son is very confused about how to be kind to his father and fears disobeying him, and yet is concerned about letting this lady take away his wealth, as he always keeps telling me the hadith of the Prophet, 

“You and your wealth belong to your father”. 

They know it and they take advantage of that. So, what is your view about all of this? Does not the verse, 

{Do not give your money that Allah made for you to the weak-minded}

stand in contradiction to that hadith? Are there no limits in obeying parents? Should he submit to the demands of the wife who knows no religion or manners, leaving her to take his money using their point of weakness, which is obedience to their father? Should he give the money to this irresponsible brother, or what? 

Benefit us, may Allah benefit you.

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Grantor of Mercy

All praise belongs to Allah, and may prayers and peace be upon Allah’s final Messenger.

May Allah thank you for your obedience to your father, and may He bless you with the obedience of your children to you, and may He lead you to what is good for you. The hadith of the Prophet (pbuh), “You and your wealth belong to your father” was authenticated by the vast majority of Hadith scholars, but it is not unconditional. Some of the people of knowledge restrict the context of this hadith to the needs of the father, due to what was proven authentic in the “Mustadrak” of al-Hākim, who authenticated it, and so did al-Albāni, may Allah bestow His mercy upon him, that the Prophet (pbuh) said, 

“Your children are the gift of Allah to you; He grants females to whomever He likes, and He grants males to whomever He likes, so they and their wealth belong to you, if you were in need of it.” 

That is why Ibn Qudāmah commented, “The father can take what he likes from the money of his son, even if [the father] is rich, with two conditions: (1) not to cause injustice to the son and not to take what the son needs, and (2) not to take from the money of one child to give it to another child, as that is considered favoring one child over another, which is not allowed.” Also, not to cause or support a sin, nor excessively spend or waste the money, which is why al-Shawkāni said, “It is permissible for the father to use the money of his son as if it were his own, so long as it is not spent excessively and irresponsibly.” 

Thus, as it is forbidden to waste money and spend excessively, you are not required to give the money to them for the reasons you have mentioned. However, explain this matter to them in a kind manner, or you could ask some of your relatives whom your father loves and trusts to explain your reasons to your father. Do not forget to stand beside your brother and do not support Satan against him, out of piety to your father, and do not forget to keep your ties of kinship, and prevent all resulting corruption by not losing him. 

And Allah the Exalted knows best.